Grandpa Richard's Kids

Guideline # 8 for Positive Parenting
Avoid Bribery

We’ve all done it, especially with younger and unruly children. The problem with offering bribes for good behavior is that kids become focused on the rewards and do not worry so much about what is good behavior. Children who are accustomed to bribes may also demand more bribes and refuse to behave, unless there’s something in it for them!

That doesn’t mean you can’t reward your children, but just as we’ve talked about being consistent and having consequences related to the behavior, rewards should be related as well. For example, if you are planning to go out for some errands and you’re concerned that your children might misbehave, don’t offer to buy them a toy or treat for their good behavior. Instead you can say something like:

“If you can stay close to me while we’re shopping that means we can get done much more quickly. If we can get done quickly, we’ll have enough time to stop at the play area before we go.”

Now, they can better understand that good behavior has immediate and logical consequences. i.e. When they behave well, the shopping gets done faster and there is more time for fun stuff.